Secret Disappearance
by third charm
Summary: After Carter's choise to stay in Africa, Abby left the ER without telling them one important secret. And now, 3 years later, it comes to hunt her. R
1. Dissappearance

Carter walked to his locker, he was happy; he just got back from Africa, he loves a woman who is pregnant with his child and he is ready to marry her. His life was perfect and nothing could mess with that.  
  
He opened his locker and immediately noticed a white envelope with Abby's handwriting, saying 'John Carter' in big letters on it. He opened it and read it silently: 'Dear John, Good Luck with everything in the future! Goodbye, Love you always - Abby Lockhart'. It was simply written, with black pen on white paper.   
  
'Goodbye, Love you always – Abby…' His mind kept repeating that simple line, she always loves him, always did and always will.   
  
He had no idea just how much.  
  
He looked around the lounge hoping to see her, but she wasn't there. His mind finally understood the words, he didn't understand their meaning but they did register in his brain.  
  
He didn't know what he would say to this new information; a big part of him said 'Just forget it, you are going to have a real family soon' but there was a little part that said 'You have to talk to her, you still love her too'.  
  
He looked around the lounge again, this time his look fell on her locker.  
  
"What the…?" He mumbled under his breath.  
  
Abby's locker didn't have her name on it; it had someone else's name. He looked around the lookers 'Maybe she changed lookers' he thought, but he didn't see her name.   
  
John quickly put on his robe and walked to the reception area, he spotted Luka and walked to him "Hey Luka! Where's Abby?" He didn't care that he did see him in half an year, he needed to understand Abby's note.  
  
"What?" Luka looked surprised.  
  
"Abby? Her name isn't on her locker." John explained.  
  
"You don't know?" Luka asked walking to a patient.  
  
"Know what?" John said following him.  
  
"She left, like 6 months ago." He said, looking over a patient.  
  
"What do you mean? Where? Why?" John was confused; He hadn't spoken to her since he left for Africa, but he was always sure she would be here when he got back.   
  
"I don't know she just quit one day and disappeared." Luka said.  
  
"Disappeared? What? To where?" Carter became more and more confused by the minute.  
  
"No one knows" Luka said and walked out of the exam room.  
  
Carter stayed put, trying to understand what Luka just said and the meaning of the Abby's note 'It was goodbye, real goodbye, she left… forever. But why?' His mind was asking a million questions a second and no one could answer them.  
  
'Disappeared!!!'  
  
- 3 Years later -  
  
"Dr. Lockhart! 5 MVA victims are coming in 2 minutes." the head nurse said, putting the phone down.  
  
"Page someone else, I'm off." Abby said, putting her jacket on.  
  
"There no one else." the nurse said simply.  
  
"I can't, my daughter's birthday party in 2 hours." Abby said, clearly confused between her duty as a mother and her duty as a doctor "Page Matthews" Abby added, while pulling her jacket off and running to the EMS entry.  
  
- 40 minutes later -  
  
Abby is back in her coat and walking toward the front desk. A little girl is sitting on it, talking to a nurse.  
  
"Thanks Dona." Abby took the little girl in her arms "Let's go get ready for your party, baby." She kissed her on the cheek, took the baby bag and they walked outside.  
  
"Albert!" Abby called to the head of staff which passed her without even noticing them.  
  
"Abby!" Dr. Kent looked back surprised "What are you doing here? Happy Birthday Joan!" he hugged both Abby and her daughter once he remembered it was Joan's birthday "I thought…" He didn't finish, when Abby cut his "You are 4 doctors short! You said you will take care of it!" Abby said in angry voice.  
  
"I am, I hired 2 already, and they should be here on Monday." Dr. Kent said.  
  
"We need at least 3! Yesterday!" Abby tried to calm herself, so Joan will not get scared.  
  
"I know" Albert said.  
  
An EMS bus pulled and Dr. Kent run to it, turning to Abby "We will manage this weekend without you. Have fun!" He tried to sound happy, but the truth was: they were already 2 Dr. short for months and 3 weeks ago two others quit, the remaining 6 doctors barely left the hospital in that time, but he also couldn't say no to Abby, she spent most of her time at the hospital, getting to see her daughter only at nights or when the baby sitter couldn't stay any longer. And Joan needed Abby, especially because Abby was a single parent.  
  
- 3 days later -  
  
Abby was looking at a patient, when she spotter Dr. Kent with the corner of her eye "Albert!"  
  
He stopped and walked to Abby "Yes?"  
  
"Where is the promised backup?" Abby asked, still looking at the patient.  
  
"Dr. Sheen started already and the other one will start tonight." he informed her.  
  
"We need 2 extra doctors a shift, not one!" she said rather angry, she was tired, overworked and she missed her daughter, this weekend wasn't alone time with her daughter like she wanted, it was one little party after another.  
  
Anyone else couldn't get away with giving an attitude to the head of staff but Abby could. Dr. Albert Kent understood how she felt, they all were tired this last month and he also knew how hard it is to be a single parent, his son was over 20 now, but he still remembered the feeling of having a full time job and taking care of a child.  
  
"He just got here tonight; I couldn't ask his to be right in." He explained.  
  
"And what about the third one?" Abby pushed the issue.  
  
"I am still looking." He said, hugging Abby and walking away.  
  
- 9 hours later -  
  
Abby was trying to stabilize a GSW victim for over 2 hours, her shift ended an hour ago and her baby sitter was waiting with Joan at the front desk.  
  
"Dr. Lockhart, you baby sitter needs to go." a nurse informed Abby.  
  
"Keep an eye on Joan please!" Abby said, still busy "And get the new Dr. here, will you!"   
  
-10 minutes later -  
  
The door opened and Abby heard a male voice "What do we have here?"   
  
Abby froze for a second, but came back soon, 'I know that voice' she thought to herself. Her heart was beating fast and hard. She said what's needed to be done with the patient, the new Dr. stood now on the other side of the patient, Abby passed her tools to him and finally looked up. The air caught in her throat.  
  
'It is him'  
  
"Abby?!"  
  
A/N so what to you think? Should I continue? 


	2. Saved by the bell or beep or wounded pat...

A/N I dont own any of the characters, English isn't my first language so excuse the grammer and spelling mistakes.  
  
Thanks for the kind reviews! NaomiP: I am trying to reread it, even a few times, but it sounds logical to me. Again sorry for the mistakes.  
  
"Abby?!" John's voice was chocked, he forgot about the patient at once, and now all his attention was on Abby, she still seemed as beautiful as she looked 4 years ago.  
  
All the questions he had for this entire time rose and he was ready to fire them all.  
  
Abby was flushed; she couldn't believe this was happening, she run away from him and here he was, in front of her, looking surprised and shocked. 'He looks cute' she thought. Still, after almost 4 years he looked cute in her eyes.  
  
They both just stood there, forgetting about the wounded victim, letting his slowly die, luckily for them both, the beeping machines woke them up.  
  
Abby took control and said "I got to go, save him!" she run away before he could reply, she wanted to talk to him, but she wasn't ready, and she had a daughter waiting for her, his daughter, how will she explain that to him?!   
  
She hopped to live her life without seeing him ever again. But that wasn't her luck.  
  
She felt like moving far, far away, running from him, or maybe from herself.  
  
Abby quickly picked up Joan and walked out of the hospital.  
  
Hopefully, they will have different shifts tomorrow and she won't have to face him yet, she knew one day she will have to tell him everything, but she wanted that day to be as far as possible.  
  
Carter's first shift was a mess, he wondered to wrong rooms, gave wrong orders, and almost killed 2 easy patients. He was confused with the new hospital and new staff, but even more, he was confused about Abby, he couldn't stop thinking about her, about what she was up to all this time, she finished school, that he knew, and what else? Was she seeing someone, maybe even married and living the perfect life?  
  
The morning arrive soon, Carter was running from one patient to another, he met most of the nurses and the doctors, but only one of them was on his mind, and he hopped she had a morning shift, if he had to do a double shift on his first day, at least it would be with catching up on the last 3 and a half years.  
  
Abby walked into the lounge, carefully opening the door, making sure Carter wasn't there. She didn't sleep more than an hour that night, between seeing Carter and Joan's flu, she was beat, but she couldn't take any time off, they were still 2 doctors short and she felt obligated to this hospital, it was her home since she left Chicago, she finished school and started working there right away, all her friends where from there, and they all helped her deal with Joan for the pass 3 years.  
  
The lounge door opened while Abby was putting her robe on, she didn't hear it, she was deep in her thoughts. "Hello beautiful" a male voice said, she felt a pair of hand on her hips and she jumped, turned to face the voice "Oh Mike…" she took a deep breath "Thanks god it's you" she said, hugging him.   
  
Dr. Mike Cox was her first real friend in this hospital, he gave her the full tour of the hospital and later the whole city, they had one main thing in comment, their kids, Abby met him for the first time at the delivery floor, his wife gave birth to twins one day after Abby gave birth to Joan, later as she started to work, he was nice to her and they hit it of.  
  
"Didn't mean to scare you" Mike said "Is everything okay with Joan?" He asked  
  
"Yeah, she just has a little cold, why?" Abby was still slightly apprehensive.  
  
"You look a little jumpy, that's all." he said, taking his robe off.  
  
Abby sat on a couch. "How was Dr. Carter first day?" she asked hesitantly.  
  
Mike laughter quietly and said "He said he's doing this for 13 years, but he looked like a med student out there."  
  
"You weren't hard on him, were you?" Abby said, surprised that she cared so much "It's his first day, he needed time to adjust." Abby tried to sound mutual.  
  
"New doctors are worst that med students, they think they know everything and hate to get help." Mike said, putting some stuff from his locker to his bag.  
  
"Well, thank you!" Abby laughter, trying to sound hurt.  
  
Mike laughter with her "You weren't a new doctor; you were a med student turned into a doctor." He finished and sat by Abby on the couch "Anyway, you can give him the chance to adjust now." He kissed her temples and got up.  
  
"What?" Abby asked surprised.  
  
"He's working a double" Mike explained "Seriously, is everything okay?" He always was a little worried about Abby.  
  
"Yeah it's just…" she wanted to tell him the full story but the lounge door was opened and there he was.  
  
"Speaking of the devil" Dr. Cox mumbled quietly, but both Abby and Carter heard him. Abby wanted to laugh but she choked instead, seeing him brought so many memories.  
  
"Abby" Carter said, he looked tired and surprised, he wasn't sure what Abby told this Dr. but John didn't really liked him.  
  
Dr. Cox looked back in surprise that the new Dr. knows Abby's first name already. "You know each other?" He asked.  
  
"Yes, we worked in Chicago together" Abby said, she hoped Mike will ask her more questions and stay there, so she will not be left alone with Carter, she wasn't ready to talk to him, not yet. But Dr. Cox didn't notice that Abby wanted him to stay, he opened the door and left, saying a quick "See you later". Abby and Carter were left alone, together but not for long, as Carter collected his courage to speak the door opened and a nurse quickly announced "3 stub victims are in!" Abby jumped of the couch and without saying a word she exit the lounge, silently thanking god.  
  
For 4 hours she succeeded to ignore John, she run from one patient to another and if she saw him in the hall she just turned and walked to some room. But after 4 hours she was tired. Abby walked quietly to the lounge, making sure no one is there and lie on the couch, she closed her eyes and tried to rest for a little while, right then the door opened, she was too tired to look who it was, she felt someone lifting her legs and sit on the couch, putting her legs in his/hers lap.  
  
"Abby we need to talk, you can't ignore me forever" It was Carter's voice, Abby thought about pretending to be asleep but he didn't gave her that chance "I know you aren't sleeping" He massaged her legs a little.  
  
She opened her eyes and sat up "Hi" she said with shy smile.  
  
"Hi" he repeated, not really knowing what to say.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Abby wanted to make this conversation about him, maybe he will forget that she is the one who disappeared without a trace.  
  
"A good position opened and I took it. What about you?" he wasn't going to let her forget that she is the one who left first  
  
"Ahh…" What could she say, she got pregnant with his child and after being dump by a letter, she left to start over?!  
  
As on cue the door opened the a nurse stood there "Abby, Joan's day care called, she is sick, you need to pick her up" Abby was saved for the second time today, but she knew that while she will be picking Joan, she will have to build a plan on how to tell everything to Carter.  
  
Abby quickly got up and opened her locker to pull her coat out of it.  
  
Carter didn't move, he felt his heart brake 'Abby has child, probably a husband too.' he thought, 'I missed my chance by staying in Africa'.  
  
"I'll talk to you later" Abby said, walking out of the lounge.  
  
Carter didn't hear her, he was still thinking about his stupid choices.   
  
- An hour later -  
  
Abby brought Joan to the ER, she hated the fact that Carter will see her and she will have to come clean, but her regular baby sitter was busy and Joan was sick, she needed Abby right now and Abby couldn't leave work.  
  
She walked into the lounge, making sure Carter isn't there, she put Joan on the couch and changed into her robe, she took Joan arm and they walked to the front desk.  
  
"Rose, can you look out for Joan for a while and find someone to cover for me?" Abby put her daughter on the counter, kissed her and said "Be good sweety, mommy will be back really soon" she hugged her and walked to pick up a patient "Thanks Rose" Abby called, going to exam room.  
  
No one could cover for Abby, and Joan was getting restless and tired. One thing was in her favor; Carter was busy over his head.  
  
- An hour and a half later -  
  
Abby walked to the front desk, Joan and Rose weren't there, she was worried. "Dan, where's Rose?" Abby asked quickly, the male nurse that did Rose's work.  
  
"She took Joan to the lounge, to take a nap" he answered.  
  
"Thanks" Abby smiled and run to the lounge, 'Thanks god the nurses were so nice' she thought. She entered the lounge and found Rose sitting on the couch reading a magazine, while Joan's head rested on her lap and the rest of her little body was sleeping on the couch.   
  
"Thank you Rose" Abby said quietly as she walked to her sleeping daughter, she was so cute, she had a lot of Carter's look and when he will see her, he will know it is his daughter.  
  
Rose slowly slide from under the sleeping girl, being replaced by Abby.  
  
"Dr. White said he will cover for you, he should be here in an hour. If you need me to look after her, I'll be at the desk" Rose whispered and walked out of the lounge.  
  
For twenty minutes it was quiet, Joan was sleeping on Abby's lap and Abby was stroking her hair and kissing her head, thinking of a way to tell to Carter before he'll find out himself, then the door opened and Rose got in "Dr. Lockhart, they need you in exam 3 ASAP!" she whispered. Abby softly got up, kissed her daughter's head, one last time and left the room but not before whispering "Give her Tylenol if I won't be back in time".  
  
The patient is exam 3 was crashing and Abby tried to save him for almost half an hour, when finally Dr. White showed "Dr. Lockhart" he greeted her "I'll take over, Joan is screaming her lungs out". Abby informed him of what she did already for the patient and walked out. She didn't hear Joan scream like Dr. White said, she didn't even heard her cry. When she was near the front desk, she saw why.  
  
"Abby?!"  
  
A/N so what to you think? 


	3. Time To Talk Or Maybe Later

"Abby?!" Carter's voice was quiet but angry.   
  
He held Joan in his arms and rocked her gently, he knew who she was.   
  
Joan was quiet and looked comfortable in his arms, like she recognized him.  
  
Abby heart skipped a beat, how could she stop them from knowing each other?! Looking at them together warmed her heart and for a little while she was lost in another world, a world where she and John raising Joan together and love each other. Unfortunately, she got back quickly from that world, when she heard Carter raise his voice "Abby, she is 3?!"   
  
Abby knew what he meant by that, he wanted to make sure she was his. She noticed that his question brought an audience of people she knew and didn't know, she felt like this is going to be ugly "Let's talk in the lounge" she said.  
  
Carter was about to fight her, he was tired from her 'talk later' stuff, he wanted to know right now, why this girl, Abby's daughter was 3 and looked a little too much like him and not like someone else, but he saw the looks he got from the nurses and doctors "Let's go".  
  
Abby wanted to take Joan from Carter, but her heart stopped her 'he did know about her for so long, let them have each other' he heart said.  
  
They entered the lounge and Abby brought a chair in front of the couch and sat on it, motioning for them to sit on the couch. Carter was surprised that Abby didn't try to take the little girl away from him, if she did, he wouldn't have given Joan to her, and if she is his daughter he will fight her. The fact that Abby didn't take the girl away said to Carter that she is his daughter and his heart melted.  
  
"She is mine?" Carter finally said, after a few minutes of silence.  
  
Abby nodded, looking away, afraid of his reaction.  
  
"Is that why you left?" He tried to stay calm, but how could he? She had his daughter and didn't tell him.  
  
"Yes" Abby said, slowly putting her look on him and Joan.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me???" he asked angrily.  
  
"You left to Africa" she said in a quiet voice.  
  
"When did you found out?" he lowered his voice, noticing that Joan got scared from his shout.  
  
"About a week after you left" she lowered her look to her feet, embarrassed about what she did.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?" He kissed Joan's head, he felt so angry at Abby, but then again looking at Joan, his heart melted.  
  
"I waited till you get back, but you never did, you dump me by a letter!" now she was mad, remembering the letter she got, when Luka got back.  
  
"I am sorry, if I knew…" John buried his head in Joan's hair, smelling her, remembering every little thing about her. He really screwed up by staying in Africa.  
  
"I called Susan when she was born, I wanted to tell you…" she went quiet, remembering how much power it took her to call Susan. She asked her about Carter, without telling her about Joan, and after what Susan told her, she couldn't call Carter.  
  
"Susan knew?" John was surprised, if she knew, she would have told him.  
  
"No!" Abby quickly answered "She told me you just got back, and you had a girlfriend that was pregnant, and you wanted to marry her" she said it very quietly, still feeling the same hurt and heart brake she felt when Susan tried to explain it all the her.  
  
Abby felt tears rise inside and to try to stop them, she jumped angrily and took her daughter away from John "Speaking of which, where's your wife and child?" She said it angrily; it was the only way to hide her pain. John already has a child; she will not give him her child.  
  
Abby stood in front of her locker holding Joan tightly and looked back on John, he suddenly became quiet and his look shifted from loving mad, that he had when he held Joan to sad mad, she could see tears fall from his eyes, even when he tried to hide his face. "He was born still and Kem went back to Africa".  
  
Abby's heart went out to him, in one second she regretted everything she just said "I'm sorry" she mumbled and sat next to him and let Joan move to his lap. That girl sure knew that it was her father. She forgot her anger, she just wanted to hold him and be there for him. All the old feeling rose inside, and out of nowhere she hugged him and Joan. He put one arm around Abby's waist, his other still held tightly to Joan.  
  
That feeling of being so close to one another was overwhelming for both of them, they were crying, but they still didn't move, holding each other and their little girl.  
  
The lounge door opened and Dr. Kent got inside, he was angry and without even noticing what's was going on, he loudly said "Dr. Carter! Abby!" then he noticed that they were hugging and crying, they pulled away and looked at him "What's going on here?" he asked.  
  
"Nothing." Abby said, taking Joan from Carter and drying her tears.  
  
Carter stood up and also dried his tears.  
  
"You wanted something?" Abby asked Albert.  
  
"Abby, is there something I should know about?" Albert looked concerned.  
  
"I'll go finish my shift" John felt that Abby needed to do this alone, he kissed Joan's head and left the lounge.  
  
Abby set back down on the couch and motioned Albert to sit in front of her.  
  
"What's wrong?" Dr. Kent asked.  
  
Abby took a deep breath and said "Carter is Joan's father" It was the first time she said it, no one here, or at all, knew that Carter was Joan's father, not many people even knew Abby and Carter, the ones who did, didn't know about Joan and the rest didn't know Carter. Till now, at least.  
  
"What? The Dr. from Chicago? I didn't even really though about her father" Albert didn't know what to say, he knew that Joan had a father somewhere but Abby never even mentioned him.  
  
"By the way, you could have told me that you hire a Dr. from Chicago, give me some time to prepare for this" she hit his leg playfully  
  
"Are you okay with him working here?" Dr. Kent was still a little shocked by the new information "I can fire him"  
  
"And we will move back to hospital again, I don't think so" Abby smiled 'Maybe this will be a good thing' she thought.   
  
"It's a good thing, Joan is going to have both of her parents now. Right?" Albert said  
  
"Yeah" Abby said, she wasn't so sure she wanted to share Joan with anyone, but that was another issue.  
  
"I will go take care of some patients" Albert said, getting up from his chair "Are you going home?"   
  
"No, can you tell Carter will be in the park, waiting for him" she hugged the elderly Dr., he was like a father to her, this pass 3 years and she loved him dearly "Thank you" she whispered to his ear.  
  
"Welcome" Dr. Kent whispered back.   
  
They ended the hug and Albert left the room.   
  
Abby took Joan and her bags and they walked out of the ER, smiling as she saw Carter working on a patient.  
  
John walked to the park; he saw Abby and Joan right away: Joan sat on Abby's lap while she slowly pushed the ground under the swing. He stopped; anger and love filled him in the same time. He stood there, just thinking about what should he say or do, once he approach them. Will he get the feeling of love to his new found daughter win, and just let Abby say and do what ever she wanted with this situation or will he let the feeling pf anger towards Abby win, and just scream at her and sue her for the custody. His thought traveled for long and when he was finally awoken, he noticed Abby and Joan weren't in the park anymore. He couldn't blame them, it was late and he was the one who just froze 20 meters away from them, but he still felt anger, 'Abby run away again' he thought. Without the face of his daughter, his anger level overcame the love level and he was momentarily happy that they left. 


End file.
